Sunday, November 15, 2009 @ 6:48 AM
Why can't you give me more care and love just like how you gave didi?
Why must i always be neglected by you and taking all the blames.
Why can't i get a chance to speak for myself, when i'm getting scolded for nothing?D:
Why must you bring me to such torture?
If only i knew i would be in this kind of life, than i would hope you aborted me...
I always tried hating you, but i couldn't.
I made up my mind to ignore you , but you're my mum.
And whenever i see you getting hurt, my heart breaks.
I doubt you feel the same.
Do you ever considered me as your daughter?
I have no one to talk to when i'm at home.
Life at home, felt worse then hell.
I really want to leave home, i dislike home. But thinking that you and bros might get blamed, and being worried , i just couldn't do it.
If only i was a boy, if only i can be what you wanted me to be...
than life might be easier.. and memorable....
Dad and you said, my future would be torturing..
I'll be ill-treated.
I asked myself why.
Why must god do all this to me.
I hope i could fight fate.
Cause i'm not giving up so easily.
I know..
Suicidal is no longer a solution.
Cause i've tried it too many times and i didn't succeed .
Why must you think that i'm such a bad girl of yours.
When all the things you listed for me, wasn't any of those i did.
I'm innocent, but you'll never believe.
Cause, all you ever cared.
Was CTH, your youngest son.
Enough of my rants, enough of tears.
Cause i know,
I'm ugly and never ever fit to be your daughter.
I'm sorry to be born like this, i'll make you believe in me,
and be proud of me someday.
I will...